Or, A Comprehensive Guide To Using Unorthodox Thinking To Escape Your Mental Prison

The Difference Between A Whore And A Slut, And What It Means To Be Sexy

The terms “whore” and “slut” are used fairly interchangeably as derogatory references to promiscuous women (well, usually women, so I’m going to stick with that for this post).  Most of the people who use them don’t consider–or don’t care–that there is a rather significant difference between them.  Although they can technically be considered the same, that would be like saying that a cat and a dog are both animals and it ends there.  There are more details to consider, and they aren’t exactly subtle.

The primary difference, the defining difference, is motive.  A whore is a promiscuous woman who exchanges sexual favors for something else that she wants.  She generally doesn’t take pleasure in the act itself, but she considers the sacrifice worth the reward.  This could be money–it usually is–or drugs, but it can also be any number of other things.  It can be argued that some women are “whores” who sell their sexual favors for male attention.  This can even lead to the argument that many domestic housewives today whore themselves out to their own husbands in order to get what they want around their home.  I’ll let you do what you will with that train of thought.

Sluts, on the other hand, are promiscuous women who have sex solely because it gives them pleasure.  They typically do not ask anything in return, and often will seek it out themselves instead of waiting for somebody to proposition them.  Although you could argue that they are a whore because they are exchanging sex in order to get what they want–sex–the point is a rather petty technicality, and overlooks the crucial issue of whether or not they derive pleasure from the act.  A slut is in it for the sex, nothing else–you might even call them a sex purist.

So, is it possible to be both?  Most definitely.  Why not benefit from doing what you love?  However, I will leave it up to you to decide which is the preferable option.

 

Now that we have created an understanding of promiscuity, let’s examine what makes a person sexy.  First of all, sexy is not necessarily synonymous with desirable.  Usually, if you are sexy, you become desirable, but that isn’t a concrete rule.

Modern media sells sexy like it’s the prize in the bottom of a Cracker Jack box.

Oh yeah, I'm definitely getting laid tonight

We all know that sex sells (hell, without it, we probably wouldn’t tolerate advertising nearly half as well as we barely do already).  But what most people don’t realize is that sexy sells just as well.  All kinds of products are bought because the marketing convinces you that with it, you will become sexy.

Unfortunately, there isn’t an ounce of truth in that.  Sexy is an attitude, it is a mindset, that has very little to do with outward appearance and everything to do with confidence.  It is an unconditional love of your self-image.  This doesn’t necessarily mean that you wouldn’t change anything–self improvement is always a respectable goal–but it means that, no matter what time of the day it is, what day of the week, or what time of the year, when you look in the mirror you think, “Damn, I look good.”  You don’t have to strut around, shoving this egocentric mantra down everyone else’s throats, though.  It does them no good.  If you cannot reassure yourself that you look good when you are by yourself, then forcing other people to acknowledge it for you isn’t going to improve your confidence either.  Sexy is something you achieve on your own.

As far as the dress code for sexy goes–there is none.  Sure, there are certain things that we might automatically see and label “sexy”–a leggy woman in stockings, a chick in high heels, a school girl outfit–but it is all subjective.  You can wear anything you want if you are sexy, because it has nothing to do with clothing or style.  I wear pajamas to class half the time, and I get laid by unbelievably attractive men whenever I want.  Seriously, these guys are like Adonis reincarnated.  And they love what I’m working with.  Trust me, it’s not about the clothes.

Being sexy is 90% your perception of yourself, and 10% others’ perception of you.  Now, I know this seems to countermand my previous point, but it shouldn’t.  After sexy comes desirability, and that is what you use to attract someone to you for companionship or sex.  The role that other peoples’ perceptions play is nothing more than creating a playing field for you to work with.  Guidelines.  When you take a look at your target market (by which I mean, the type of people you want to attract to you), you need to understand where the boundaries are.  This shouldn’t inhibit you by any means, but it helps you determine what will or will not alienate you as you create your own definition of sexy.  For example, if, when you look in the mirror, you feel that a giant purple hat with feathers makes you absolutely stunning, the role that others’ perceptions would play here is to demonstrate how people will react were you to wear that in public–and how their reactions would affect you in turn.  Chain reaction.  So, while your sexy belongs to you and you alone, it is important to consider which social norms–whether they be popular or local–you want to be a part of your self-image.

What it comes down to is that sexy is all in your head.  You can’t even say that it is “in the eyes of the beholder,” because they will only see what you want them to see.  Confidence is a powerful aphrodisiac, and there is nothing quite as sexy as someone who knows that they are sexy, who knows what they want, and are determined to get it.

 

 

 

 

6 responses

  1. Interesting read…… :)

    November 26, 2011 at 3:46 am

  2. Joallen

    I am a bigger girl…maybe I should stop caring about what others (men) think and just be happy being me and maybe once I stop caring and just be comfortable in my own skin, maybe good things will happen…mmmm interesting read for sure!

    November 4, 2012 at 9:33 pm

  3. I am so glad that you were able to take a bit of encouragement from this piece; I am a realist myself so I understand how the world works–you know, the whole, wishing long enough will make the whole world right school of thought–however, I really do believe that your life is what you make it, and subtle influence is a strong force. I mean, look at the campaigns going on, right? change the color of the TV screen and suddenly someone is a bad guy. So the way you project yourself certainly does alter how others receive you.

    November 4, 2012 at 10:54 pm

  4. I meant to say that the ‘wishing long enough will make the whole world right’ school of thought is only a fantasy.

    November 5, 2012 at 2:22 pm

  5. Right on!

    March 3, 2013 at 12:12 am

  6. ;lkhj;h

    exactly the opposite !

    April 16, 2013 at 1:31 pm

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